I am writing tonight on a subject that I know nothing about. I hope that I never know much more about this than I know right now. For the only way to truly know about this particular subject would be to experience it as a parent or immediate family member and I pray that I am spared of this. The subject of which I speak is the untimely or unexpected death of a child at any age.

This subject has been on my mind for some time now as a life-long friend and her family lost a child to a battle against cancer a few weeks back. The battle was a long one, the finality of the ending not necessarily unexpected but tragic in any way it can be said as they watched their precious child dying before their eyes with nothing to be done by them or medical science to prevent the inevitable. This has to be the most difficult of human experiences with no possible way to explain this loss to your heart in a manner that satisfactorily answers the question of “Why?”

Why my child? Why did my child have this horrible disease? Why was there no cure available for my child?  Why did my child have to die in the accident? Why? Why? Why?  No answers come, only the tears, memories and desires to hold them one more time.  Again, this is a subject I know nothing about on a first hand basis and pray that I never do.

But, I have witnessed it too many times over the years with friends and loved ones. These lost children have happened by diseases such as cancer, automobile accidents, drownings, ATV accidents, a horse riding accident, and even homicide in one particular family. In each and every one of these, I asked the “Why?” question to myself over and over with no answers from anywhere forthcoming.

Many of the deaths of children of whom I became aware happened during the years I was the principal at Holmes County High School and Vernon High School. These two schools lost more than 20 young people who died unexpectedly during the 22 years I was the principal. In every one of these losses, there was a giant hole left in the family that could never be filled. Though the passage of time allows for some healing of the wound, the hurt and heartbreak of loss is ever present. In speaking with many of these family members over the years, it is a pain that is always there. I will say again, I pray this is a pain I never have to understand firsthand.

In my upcoming book, I have included several essays on some of these tragic losses in an attempt to put into words the impact these had on the families involved and the entire community. Of all of the essays I have written for inclusion in the books, these have been by far the most difficult to write and have taken me back to some of the worst days of being a principal.

In closing, the recent passing of the child of my friend was the 3^rd child that I can remember that has lost the battle to cancer in the last few years. Each of these was heartbreaking to me as a friend of the families to witness this terrible disease take the life of a loved one.

But even in tragedy, the power of love comes through. I have seen one of these close friends that lost a child offer love and support to others in their loss by serving as a nurse. I have seen many of her posts on Facebook over the years celebrate the life of her baby and expressing thanks for the time that he was with her and looking forward to a grand reunion one day in the future.

In the case of the latest loss, I have read with much emotion the postings of her father, sharing some of the great times that he and his child had together as she was in the middle of the battle. He has shared family photos of trips taken during the times of her illness. He has shared some funny events that happened in their travels. The love he has shared for all to read is heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time. And like my other friend, he expresses his desire to see her again one day in the future for a great reunion.

So, I will close with this. Life is full of unexpected and unexplained events, both good and bad. I am pretty sure that we as humans on this old earth will never have the answers to all of our “Why?” questions. However, I am very sure that our great Creator does know the answers to all of our “Whys?” and hopefully we will gain a better understand of these at the great reunion in the sky one of these days.

In the meantime, pray for those who have suffered these losses of loved ones and let them know you are thinking of them. God bless you all.