My girlfriend Pam Jones and I both like food that is spicy, so it is not unusual for either of us to use hot sauce like Tabasco or Crystal Hot Sauce on our food selections at home or in a restaurant. We like chips and dips that have a little kick to them and often add spice to food we are preparing.

Last week, we were on a short trip with my sister Janis and her husband Wayne Johnson, traveling along I-10 close to Mobile, Alabama. We decided to take a short break at Buc-ee’s, which is a large store/gas station/food station located close to Robertsdale. While in the store, Pam and I were looking at snacks that we might want to purchase. She found some beef jerky that was flavored with Ghost Peppers and we decided to buy some and try it. Now, the package warned anyone who was contemplating a purchase that the product was hot. But, we both like hot stuff so the warning about the product being hot fell on deaf ears or, in this case, on numb taste buds.

As a point of importance regarding this purchase, I provide the following bit of information. Peppers are rated for being hot on a scale known as the Scoville Scale. The higher the number, the hotter the pepper. Banana peppers have a Scoville rating of 500, Jalapeno peppers have a rating between 3,500 and 4,500. Habanero peppers have a rating of between 200,000 and 300,000 units or almost 100 times hotter than Jalapeno peppers. Ghost peppers have a rating of 1,000,000. Yes, you read that right, one million. We did not know this bit of information when we bought the beef jerky. All we knew was that it was supposed to be hot.

Well, we got back to the car and started on down the road. I asked her to give me a small piece of the ghost pepper jerky to try. She handed me a small piece and took one for herself. I popped my piece into my mouth and started chewing. It was a little warm but not unbearable. I reported this to Pam and she likewise put her piece into her mouth. Then the fun started.

As I continued to chew, that piece of ghost pepper beef jerky got hotter and hotter. Same thing for Pam over in the passenger’s seat. We both started looking for cold liquid to get into our mouths to help alleviate the heat. All we had was some water and coke. All these did was to cool it off when it was in your mouth but when swallowed, the heat returned with a vengeance. I have heard that milk will help take the heat away from hot peppers but since we had no milk with us, that was not an option. So, we drank our water and coke, swished these around and around and endured the heat until finally, after about 10 minutes or so, the heat started to fade. Janis and Wayne were enjoying the show in the front seat but were not tempted to give the ghost pepper beef jerky a try.

Roll forward in time to Monday. I was over in Mississippi with my friend Roger Swindle doing some work in response to tropical storm Cristobal. We were just sitting under some trees and waiting for a call out if one came. While there, we were partaking of some of the snacks we had packed for the trip. Included in these was the ghost pepper beef jerky. Having apparently lost my mind, I decided to take a small piece and give it another try.

I took a small piece out of the bag and was holding it in my hand. I was holding a drink in my other hand and my phone started ringing with my daughter Abby calling. I could not answer the phone with both hands full, so I just quickly popped the small piece of jerky into my mouth and said, “Hello.”

Abby started talking and I started chewing. In just a few seconds, the heat started coming in waves from the jerky in my mouth. I could not get the water bottle open, the heat was getting hotter, I was trying to talk to Abby and the small bite of jerky was now completely moist, oozing pepper fueled juices into my mouth getting hotter and hotter. I was trying to tell Abby about the jerky in my mouth when, all of a sudden, I took a deep breath and somehow, the fumes from the pepper went up my sinuses into my nasal cavity. Now not only was my mouth on fire but I was feeling like a dang dragon with fire coming out my nose.

 My nose started running, I couldn’t talk, I was burning up, and couldn’t get any water to drink. I was finally able to tell Abby what was going on and, of course, she just started laughing at my predicament, no sympathy at all. In fact, she was laughing so hard, she could not even talk anymore.

After a short time, I was able to get a drink of water and could catch my breath again. All the while, Abby is laughing and telling me she can’t wait to tell others about my plight. Eventually, the ghost pepper jerky began to lose its heat, I was able to swallow it and the cooling down process began.

I still have some of this ghost pepper beef jerky at home if any of you fine folks would like to try a sample. As for me, if I try to eat anymore of this fine tasting jerky, you can be sure I will have large quantities of milk available before I put even a small piece in my mouth.